I am resolved.

She’s a dancer — when she dances, she is free.
~Emily Jane White, “Time on Your Side

That line has always resonated with me, ever since I first listened to it on the “mix tape” that Sharon gave me in the summer of 2008. I think it’s the simplicity and strength of the statement. She is a dancer. Of course, she must dance — and when she does, it brings freedom.

I’m many things. A pianist. A designer. An artist.

But I’m also a writer.

It’s difficult for me to write openly. There are many things I fear. I fear that my thoughts are not socially acceptable. That I am not socially acceptable. I fear the judgment of those I love and even of those I don’t know. I fear revealing myself to be a fake or a failure, or even simply mediocre. I fear being wrong. I fear, I fear, I fear.

And because of that fear, I have not written. And it’s felt like bondage. And I long for freedom.

I’ve updated my about me page, and also added a comment policy and a contact form. I don’t have an official writing schedule, but I hope to write at least once a week, if not 2-3 times weekly. And I want to allow myself to publish “unpolished” writing. My fear has crept into my writing in the form of extreme self-editing to remove all emotions, and I am coming to believe that the strength in my writing disappears when I disconnect myself.

So this year, I am resolved.

I will write openly, freely, honestly, and often.

Because I am a writer. When I write, I am free.


One thought on “I am resolved.

  1. Pingback: In which I have stories to tell. | crooked neighbor, crooked heart.

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